Kira Horton.

Dear Kira,

This is the hardest thing I have ever done. Just like when we said goodbye today. I thought saying goodbye to you would be the easiest, because we're going to see each other so much this summer. But it ended up being the hardest out of all of them. I cried so much on the drive home, and all I could think about was that you were still in the dorms, and I could have been there with you.
You know that saying, save the best for last? I did that. Right when I decided to do these blog posts, I knew you would be last. Because the saying is true. Last is the best. Just like you're the best.

You are the best friend I have ever had. You know me better than I know myself sometimes. I've never had a friend as true as you. I don't know what I'm going to do now. I can't walk down the hall and come sit on your bed. There's no more going to lunch together. We aren't going to spontaneously decide to take pictures. We can't watch Tosh in the basement. There's no more watching movies in either of our rooms. You aren't able to complain about how hot my room is and open the window even though I'm still cold. We can't make dirty jokes all the time and laugh about everything. It's all over. I can't believe how fast it all went, and I can't believe how important you've become to me. 

When I think about our first year at college, I'm going to think of you. We've done so much together. We've gone through so many arguments and inside jokes and deep talks. I've never had someone care so much about me, to the point tears when you're concerned for me. No one has ever cried because they're worried about me and my health. It really hit me, at that moment, how important you are in my life. You've been my best friend since we met, but it wasn't until then that I realized how much I mean to you, too. I feel so, so loved.

I miss you. I'm already planning on seeing you in two days, and I'm making sure we hang out a lot after that. But still. We won't be hanging out in our dorm rooms that had become home. It hurts so much when I think about next year without you. I don't know how I'm going to survive. You keep me sane. No one makes me laugh like you do, and I need that. (Yes, I am only friends with you so you can make me laugh. I am 100% kidding.)

You tried so many times to prevent me from getting hurt by guys. Even though I didn't listen most of the time, I always thought about what you said and that you were probably right. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you. Maybe if I had, we wouldn't have gone through so many low points. But, then again, we wouldn't be as strong if we didn't go through all that. Just the fact that you stuck by my side means so much to me. Don't ever leave my side!

I love that my family loves you. Not as much as I do,but still. You are always, always welcome here. In fact, come live here with me. Keep me sane. Britny would love it almost as much as I would. You would just need a lesson on how to hold a conscious baby, then you would be good to go. :)

I tried to look through all of our pictures today. I don't think I'll ever have time to look at every single one. We have so many! I can't wait to add more to our collection. It's going to grow to a ridiculous amount soon. Maybe we'll get a world record for it or something.

I wish I were at the dorms with you. I wish I was in my room right now, posting this to your Facebook wall, waiting for you to read it so you can come give me a big hug. Then we'd hang out the rest of the night, probably make one last Walmart run, go do something that only the two of us would find even remotely entertaining, and then have a sleepover so neither of us are alone. I wish that would all happen tonight. But I know that I missed that chance, because now, it won't happen. Ever.

I feel like I still have so much to say. I want to thank you for everything, Kira. For being there for me. For loving me. For being the best friend I could ever ask for. You've helped me through so many things in my life. Because of you, I'm genuinely trying to be healthier. I want to live a long, long time so that we can be friends until we die. So you must be healthy too. I love you too much to not tell you to be healthy. You are one of the most beautiful people I have ever known. Both inside and out. You may not believe it all the time, but everyone else does. Because it's true. You are amazing. You light up my life, and countless other lives as well. That's how amazing you are.

I love you so much, Kira. You are more than I could ever ask for, more than I ever imagined. No one has a best friend as great as mine.

Love, Me.

P.S. Don't ever change, H.A.G.S.!

P.P.S. I couldn't decide which pictures to include, so I just included all of the ones that I could find. I love every single one of them. I hope you do too. :)

Kenneth J. Fryar-Ludwig

 I've been thinking about this post for ten days now. There is so much that I want to say. I think you are one of the greatest people I have ever met. Seriously, you've set standards that people I meet in the future have to meet up to. You have changed my life in so many ways. Want me to tell you all of them? Okay. This will be a long post.

When we first got to know each other, we were sitting in my room. You asked me about my life, my past. No one has ever deliberately asked me that before. I liked that you actually wanted to really know me. And I have to say that I was baffled when you told me about your family. To be honest, I'm still kind of confused.

The first time we went for a drive, I told you I liked you. Well, I kind of told you. I made you guess. But still, that was a big thing for me, because I've never done that before. I was still really nervous around you, so I didn't say too much, but I tried. And it meant a lot that we got ice cream, because that was something you and your dad shared. Even though you probably do that with all of your friends, it still makes me feel special. After a couple hours, we sat in the Richard's parking lot and I layed my head on your shoulder. I liked that.

The night I got my appendix out, you got two of your friends to give me a blessing at one in the morning. You sat with me outside until Becca brought the car around. You came to the hospital and stayed until four in the morning. I don't know if you remember this, but when you left, you came up to me and brushed my hair away from my face and put your hand on my forehead. Just that gesture meant so much to me.

You've told me a lot of things about your past that you don't like to share. I makes me feel good to know that you trust me enough to tell me those things.

Remember when we all went to the chocolate exhibit in Old Main and then you and I went to the art museum? I kept the hat from the chocolate thing. And I still have the pictures from the art museum.

When we went to Ari's concert, you held my hand. I liked that because it was in public, and I know how much you don't like PDA. So that was really nice.

It really meant a lot to me how much you looked after me after I got surgery. I know I was really loopy on Lortab, but you took care of me. I didn't know how to say thank you while I was on drugs, so I'm saying thank you now.

I loved when you and Andrew hung out with Whitni and I over Spring Break. I also loved that you saw how ridiculously dramatic my family is, yet you didn't run away screaming. Thank goodness for that.

Remember the sticky notes you wrote to me and Becca a long time ago? I taped mine on my mirror so that whenever I see it, I can feel happy. It worked.

When you asked me to look after you when you got your wisdom teeth out, I didn't hesitate to say yes. Partly because I wanted to see how you would act on drugs, but mostly because I missed you and I wanted to see you. Also because I wanted to return the favor. Let me just say that you tell some interesting stories when you're half asleep and high.

It's the night before I go home for the summer, and it's finally starting to sink in that I won't see you at the Junction or the Marketplace anymore. I won't see you walking around campus. I can't ask you to come see me, and I can't walk across the lawn to come see you. There has been so many times when I just wanted someone to really talk to, but I decided not to call you. Now I wish that I had.

You brought me flowers and a teddy bear today. That was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. It was the best surprise ever. You might think that in some ways getting me a teddy bear was a douche bag move, but I don't think it is. I never will think it is, either. I loved it. Thank you for making my last day here so wonderful.

I hope we're able to see each other this summer before we both go our separate ways. How about if we hang out this summer, I'll sing for you, since I still haven't done that. If not, I know I'll see you eventually, before you go on your mission.

I miss you already, Kenny.

Becca Fitzgerald

 I don't know how I'm going to say everything I want to in one blog post. Some things I can't even put into words. Yes, that was very corny. But, alas, 'tis true.

You have helped me grow so much this year. There are so many things you have said and done that have meant so much to me. We have so many memories together that I'll never, ever forget. I really can't express how much you mean to me, Becca. 

 Because of you, I'm not afraid to talk. To you, to other friends, to boys. I was never able to confront people about how I felt. I always kept it to myself. But because you're so open and so comfortable with saying everything you feel, I learned to be that way too. That's changed my life so much, because I finally feel like I can say everything I need to without being afraid or bottling it up inside. You've helped me with overcoming my fear of calling people. Just ragging on me about it whenever I choose to text instead of call has pushed me to get over it. Sure, it's not a huge deal, but still. You changed it.

It means so much to me that you care. Taking me to the hospital, staying until six thirty in the morning, asking me how I'm feeling when you can tell I'm not feeling myself, and taking the time to make me feel better. Remember a few weeks ago, when you told me you asked your aunt about how I was acting with exercising so much? You thought I would find it intrusive, but I found it the opposite. No one has cared enough to confront me about it the way you did. That means so much.

And remember when Kenny asked me about my life? You told him about it for me. Then, when you were done, you came back and said something along the lines of even though I have a complicated past, there is no shortage of love in my life, because my family loves me so much and you can tell. I think about that a lot, and it makes me happy.

I also think about all of the things we've done, and the pictures we've taken. I love those times when we would laugh at everything. When we had our own inside jokes and it was hilarious that we were the only ones on the inside.

Another reason you mean so much to me has to do with the church. When I came to college, I wasn't strong in the church at all. It scared me. But I was always kind of inspired to see how happy it made you, and how much your face lit up whenever you talked about it. You never pushed me to go to church or church functions, but you always invited me. You never stopped. And when we went to Whitni's baptism and you spoke, that was when I first felt the spirit. And then I knew why it made you so happy. You helped bring that happiness back into my life. There is no way to express how thankful I am for that.

I've missed you the past while. Because things have been different, because I have been gone, because we've both changed. I wish I could have been more of a best friend to you lately instead of just a roommate. I hope that our friendship doesn't end with our first year at college. I hope it lasts a really long time.

I love you. Thank you for being there for me, and for making such a big change in my life. You'll always be in my heart.

Tom Mangum

Tom. You are more than your poofy hair and striped v-neck shirts. You are so great. You genuinely care about everyone. It sometimes amazes me how much you can talk, because you never run out of things to say. I like it because it's so you. I have fun when I'm with you. Whether we're watching South Park, cheesy action movies, sleeping, or doing homework, I love hanging out with you. We've done so many fun things for only knowing each other for a month. I'm so glad you trust me enough to tell me about personal things, and I'm glad I can trust you with the same. When you're not excessively talking(that was a joke), you really listen, and you care. It makes me feel like what I say matters. That makes me feel good.

I don't know if you remember, but you told me once that I make you happy. And that what I do makes all your cares in the world fade away. I just want you to know that you've done the same for me, and you make me happy too.

You are a really, really great guy. I am so lucky to have gotten to know you.

I hope we see each other again, but if we don't, I hope you find exactly what you are looking for. You deserve it. 

Arianna Larkin

Ari, I'm so glad we became friends this semester. Talking to you and getting to know you has been so great. You always make the best of every situation. I've seen you sad maybe one time this whole year, and even then, you were still happy about life. Whenever I'm around you, I feel happy. You make everyone so comfortable. I love that you are so sure of yourself. When we first talked for real, and you told me about your life, you said that one day you were just sick of being shy and worried about whether or not people liked you.  So you were just yourself from then on. I admire that. I wish I were able to be myself, all the time, around everyone. I look up to you for that. I look up to you for so many things. You never talk bad about anyone. You don't hold grudges. You are so kind and friendly. And you believe in everyone.

I want you to know that you deserve the best in life. You deserve to be as happy as you make everyone around you. 

You are so beautiful, even when you're just sitting around in pajamas or something. You always have this glow about you, and I love it!

I hope that we stay friends for a really, really long time. It's been so great having you in my life, and I don't want that to end. You may not realize it, but you've helped me through a lot. That means so much. I hope you know how much you mean to me!

Thank you for being so wonderful. Love you. :)

Katie Wilson

 You are so beautiful, Katie. I love hanging out with you because you always make it so much fun. You have such a positive outlook on life, and it's so uplifting. You're so confident. It's amazing the kinds of clothes you can pull off with no problem. And I love that you can just sit on your bed, play your ukulele, and sing. It's just awesome. You have such a pretty voice. I'm going to miss hearing that!

I love that you're so comfortable around everyone, and how that makes everyone comfortable around you. You've been such a role model for me this semester. It makes me feel so cool and needed when you ask me if your outfit looks good or for advice on what to wear. I love it! :)

It is so awesome that you're so comfortable with yourself. I remember when you got your wisdom teeth out, you sent a picture of yourself all swollen to Whitni so she could show all of us. When she told me you wanted everyone to see, I was kind of blown away, because I could never do that. I'm not even half as confident or comfortable with myself as you are, and that is what I strive to be. I look up to you.

I wish that we would have gotten to know each other better, because I feel like there's so much more to know. I find it so great that even though we're not super close, you've still made such a huge impact on my life. 

I hope you know how much you mean to me. Thank you for being there for me. 

Whitni Gardner

Whitni Gardner, I love you. I'm so incredibly lucky to have you in my life. You've helped me with and through so many trials and hard times already, and we've only been close since December. Bringing you home that first weekend of Christmas break was one of the best things I could have done. It was the first of our long car rides, and I loved it. We have so much in common. I feel like I can tell you so many things because you know exactly what I'm going through. And even the rare times you don't know what I'm going through, you still try to understand.

You are such a light in my life. The first time I ever truly felt the spirit was the day you were baptized. If it weren't for you, Whit, there's a huge possibility that I still wouldn't be strong in the church, I wouldn't have a testimony, and I wouldn't know of the happiness that this religion brings me. Seeing how happy it makes you is such an inspiration to me. You are so amazing. You write notes in sacrament and put them in hymn books to brighten a stranger's day, sometimes even a friend's. You resolve conflict and make sure everyone is happy. You are the reason everyone is happy, Whitni.

The little things you do mean so much. Back scratches in church. Notes in hymn books. Snorting when you laugh. The way you get so excited or happy about something, and it's all you can think about for days. The way your face lights up when you're truly happy. Giving me hugs, just because you feel like it. Complimenting your friends. Loving everyone for who they are, no matter what.

You're one of the few people I feel comfortable letting you see what my real, normal life is like. And because you never judged or thought differently of me because of it shows me that you are a true best friend.

I know that we will stay friends for a long time, and I can't wait for that.

I love you so much. Thank you for loving me too.